New Me
by rainbowinashadeofgray
Summary: Blaine Anderson had a hard freshman year at his old school. He moved to McKinley to get away from all of that and start over but can he? Sam Evans steps in trying to help him open up but something else forms. Can Blaine handle it? Rated M for mentions of suicide.


**Disclaimer-** I obviously do not own glee nor am I affiliated with any of its characters.

* * *

Blaine walked into his new high school. McKinley High. Not a very interesting name. He usually would look the school up online and check it out but it seems like this school is so outdated it doesn't even have a website. He was definitely not looking forward to going here.

He sighed as he looked for some sort of office or guidance counselor. He found a room open with a window which had a nervous looking red headed woman. The room said guidance counselor so he walked inside.

"Hello, my name is Blaine Anderson." The woman looked up, giving him a warm, somewhat overbearing smile. "I'm a transfer student. Do you have my schedule?" He shifted his feet a little, attempting to not look as awkward as he felt.

She started looking around her completely organized desk and opened up a folder that said 'Schedules.' "Oh yes! Its right here." She handed him the paper carefully and Blaine gave her a little smile. "Good luck on your day! I checked out your files, like I usually do for new students, and you're an excellent student! I hope you do as well as you did at your old school here."

Blaine frowned a little at the mention of his old school, but recovered quickly. "Thank you." He held at his hand but she shook her head strangely. As Blaine walked out he thought to himself 'Maybe I'm not the one that needs counseling.'

* * *

Blaine stirred a little in his first period class, Honors English II. His teacher, Mrs. Berger, was quite boring, despite her young age. Usually students are happy with young teachers but this lady acted like she had been teaching for 50 years already. He doodled a little on his paper, just the usual tornados people draw when they have nothing interesting going on.

This year he had decided to only focus on his classes. No friends to hold him back. No people to know his secrets. No distractions. But he could barely even bare one period of this philosophy. He needed some sort of interest. Maybe he should join a club. Probably not a sport, he had lost all respect for every jock in America. He might be able to join something simple like a piano club, but why on Earth would a piano club do. Play piano for an hour a day? No, he needed something else to do, preferably an actual club.

Blaine looked over at a brunette girl with an odd sweater on. "Excuse me, what clubs are there at this school?" he whispered quietly.

She turned her head quickly and immediately had a strange smile on her face. "We have lots of clubs here! We have the Speech Club, Mock Trial, Renaissance club, Celibacy Club, Muslim Students Club, and the Black Student Union Club!" She had a broad smile on her and he felt like she was peering into his soul. He didn't like it.

"Well all those clubs sound.. lovely.. but do you have anything.. musical?" Blaine asked wearily. Why on God's name would he want to join the Black Students Union Club anyway?

The girl's smile got even broader (if that's even possible?) and said, "We have glee club! I usually don't mention glee club to anyone, I mean we have standards. But if you like music you should sign up for glee club. It's great." She reached into her bag and pulled out what looks to be last year's year book. She opened up to the glee club page which was covered with marker drawn mustaches and objects that do not need to be mentioned. "Here we are last year! Oh and if you're wondering about all that marker someone got a hold of my year book somehow. But don't worry about the marks, they're all just jealous that they will never in our lifetime be even close to as talented as we are."

Blaine nodded, trying not to look sarcastic. Yes, I'm sure that's why, he thought. "I'm not sure that's the club for me, I just wanted something low key. I'm not really looking to be the next star on Earth in my sophomore year." Blaine tried to whisper that, he really did, but next thing he knew Mrs. Berger was back at his desk.

"Is there something you need to tell the class Mr. Anderson? No? Then I suggest you stop talking unless you want to teach this class yourself." She walked away angrily before Blaine could even think about apologizing.

* * *

Blaine walked down the hallway, looking at the map he was given of McKinley. For such a small school, Blaine couldn't seem to find his way. The next thing he knew he was getting ran into by some lunatic, getting his books knocked to the ground.

"Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to, here let me help you with your books." The boy, blond and not to mention, cute, leaned down to pick up Blaine's books. He handed them to Blaine cautiously. "I'm new here and I wasn't really paying attention." He held up his own copy of a map.

Blaine chuckled a little and help up his map. "I know how you feel. So where are you headed?" Blaine asked.

"Spanish I. With Mr. Schuester. I'm not even good with English, I don't know why I should be required to take a whole new language." The boy said, looking back down at his map confused as ever.

"I know what you mean." Blaine, of course, was great with English, but did hate the fact that he had to learn a whole new language. "I have Spanish too. Wanna be lost together?" Blaine asked, smiling a little.

"That sounds great. So where are you from 'other new guy who has Spanish with me'?" Sam asked, laughing a little, still looking flustered from the confusing map. "I'm from Kentucky. My family moved here over the summer."

"Oh I'm from a little further down state. We moved here just last week ago. Oh and my name is Blaine." He held out his hand and Sam shuck it right after word.

"Mine's Sam. So have you thought about any sports or clubs so far? I try to be involved because it covers up for when my grades aren't the best." Blaine laughed a little, this boy was like the complete opposite of him so far.

"Well I asked this overly enthusiastic girl about clubs and the only appealing one was the glee club, but it seems like they're the least popular people of the school." It was easy to draw that conclusion when they were also known as the 'Geek Club' according to the year book. "I was going to try to lay down low my first year here, not draw any attention to myself."

Sam nodded. "I get it, but that sucks I actually like singing. I don't think the chess club or anything else would accept me so I think that I'm just going to try out for football." Oh great. A jock.

"Yeah I'm not so good at sports. I might just have to join something stupid like the chess club." Blaine said sadly. He wanted to join something, but so far this school sounds like it has no choices. Imagine that.

"Well how about we start our own club! What are you interested in?" Sam looked at Blaine's backpack and saw an Iron Man comic sticking out. "Aha! Iron Man! You like superheroes?"

Blaine blushed, embarrassed that Sam saw that. "Oh um.. Yeah. I do." He was hoping that he wouldn't be made fun of for something as simple as liking superheroes. He would lose all respect for Sam over that.

"How about we start a superhero club? Oh but first what's your favorite, Marvel or DC?" Blaine laughed a little.

"It's impossible to choose. They're both so amazing." Blaine said, hoping that's what Sam wanted to hear.

"Great choice. Now let's find our way to Spanish and make our superhero club!"

* * *

It turns out making a club is harder than it sounded. Blaine and Sam asked Mr. Schuester what was required to make a club and they had to have a minimum fund of $150 and at least 20 people to sign to join. And it's hard to find people to sign when the only ones they knew were each other. So that plan was gone. But they were encouraged to join the glee club.

"Everyone in the club would welcome you both with open arms. It's like a safe haven in this school. We need more members and we would even be happy to show you both around! I really think you should join." Blaine looked over at Sam, silently asking him to respond to the teacher."

"We'll think about it and get back to you." Sam nodded, trying to look professional, and shuffled Blaine out the door along with himself.

"The superhero club would be best but maybe that guy had a point. And I heard they won sectionals last year!" Blaine didn't think that sounded too great, they beat two schools in the district. Big deal. But he did want something to do, sometimes he just needed something to take his mind off of things. But he also needed to lay low. He couldn't repeat what happened at his old school.

* * *

_I walked over to the medicine cabinet and grabbed a bottle of pain killers. My headache was killing me. Lately it was always killing me though. Whether it was a math problem or a hate message to myself something was always up._

_Sometimes it feels like a battle. A battle with myself. No matter what the other people say it's worse when it comes from myself. My head used to be a safe place but now nowhere is safe. Wherever I go someone is always criticizing me, calling me names, or just plain telling me how awful I am._

_I took two pills for my head and looked down at the bottle again. My feet were hurting too from all the people tripping me in the hallway so I took one for them. My shoulders were hurting too from being slammed into lockers so I took one for them. My knees hurt from being pushed over on the way to the bus so I took one for them. My hands hurt from shaking in the middle of class as someone tells me they're going to kill me so I take one for them. Eventually I started thinking about all of the things I hated in life and took one for each of them, and eventually the bottle was gone._

_Some people say that you cry when you're overcome by emotion, so some may think that I would be crying, but I wasn't. I knew this was coming, and I had cried many times before. This time I accepted it. And there was no emotion left in my body to be felt. I felt raw, hollow, and broken. Not wounded, broken. No one would be able to fix me._

_I sat down in my recliner, staring at the tv. Nothing was on the screen but blackness, but somehow it was more soothing than any actual show. When blackness came over all of me, I was ready. And it was the most calming moment I had experienced in months._


End file.
